For The Nights That I Miss You

Ill sing. Ill sing my favorite songs, the ones you didnt really like, the ones that deeply touched me but never made sense to you. Ill sing off key, Ill sing without perfection, Ill sing without trying to impress you. Ill sing because I have a and I want to use it, even if you never liked it.

Ill dance. Ill shake your memory off, Ill move my feet to the music and just get lost in it, for the first time, Ill get lost in the dance, not in you. For the first time, Ill dance for myself. Ill dance for my

Ill write. Ill write openly and honestly about our love, about my heartbreak, about your faults, about our fights, Ill write about you and Im not going to worry about what you might think or what you might say. Ill write everything I wish Id told you and everything I wish I had done and Ill write about you because this is how I heal,

Ill cry. Ill cry about losing you and wanting you more than you ever did. Ill cry about the plans I made for us that never happened, about all the dreams I built around you that never came true. Ill cry because it hurts to convince myself that its for the better.

Ill smile. When I remember our good times, when I remember how I loved you and how you made me feel. Ill smile because at least, at one point in time, you were everything I wanted and I saw a of what could be, a glimpse of Ill smile because youre no longer worthmy tears.

Ill let go. When I remember that you couldve had me but you walked away, when I realize that you couldve fought harder but you gave up and when I look back on all the times Ive missed you but you didnt miss me.

Ill stop.Ill stop missing you, Ill stop thinking about you, Ill stop caring about it all and I will stop dreaming and finally wake up.

Rania Naim is a poet and the author of the book.

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